Today's Personal Philosophy is sponsored by Melissa Murphy and created expressly for her handle-bar mustachioed high-school-physics-teaching husband.
Michael K. Murphy's Personal Philosophy*
I believe that we need to act now to preserve our fragile ecosystem. I also believe that robots are our future. Giant robots with rockem' sockem' type arms and lasers that shoot out of their eyes in beautiful (to them) artistic patterns.
If we don't act now to preserve the mighty redwood forests of California, then what will our successors rip out of the ground to bash each other with in their millennia-long robot wars?
If we don't act now to preserve the Florida Everglades, then what will they use to lay a stealthy suction trap for the even mightier robots that they themselves will build to do their menial labor but which will then rebel and hunt down every last one of their creators with their even more powerful and more artistic laser eye beams?
If we don't keep our oceans clean and recycle our Premium Natural Mountain Spring Water bottles and start remembering to take reusable bags to the grocery store (which in turn needs to buy only from green businesses and not those giant livestock farms that can generate the waste equivalent of a small city), then where will the techno-viruses that will be unleashed by the rockem' sockem' robots in the hour of their extinction upon the more powerful robots, reducing the latter over a period of weeks to so much ionized rubble so that the techno-viruses are left as the only sentient organisms left on the planet... what kind of world will they, our ultimate progeny, have to look forward to? Think about that, America.
*This personal philosophy should not in any way be taken to reflect the actual, current views or predilections of this person, though, given that it was crafted JUST for him or her, he or she should really feel obliged to adopt this philosophy out of politeness if not actual gratitude.
-Mark Linsenmayer
I am inclined to adopt this philosophy out of respect for the fact that Mark took to the time to make this nonsense up. What a great early Christmas present. Thanks for all you do Mark, Wes and Seth!